It’s a question I often ask my family, my friends, even myself – whether planning a vacation, stumbling over a plot twist, or facing the short side of a deadline. “What do you need” is the question that makes me dial in on what will do me the most good in any given situation.
Some times, the answer is as simple as time with girlfriends and I’m blessed with some of the best friends anyone could ask for.
I spent the past weekend with my amazing critique partners and we filled the time with delightful conversation, delicious food, and the requistite alternating of late-night margaritas followed by coffee when morning arrived again.
But before they got here, I knew what I needed most from the weekend was simply to treasure the infustion of girl-power writer energy, to catch up with each of them, to brainstorm ‘what next’, and to celebrate our latest accomplishments.
From Friday afternoon through Sunday, we indulged in birthday cake, editorial analysis, and a couple of terrific movies. My acupuncturist even joined us for the fun as well as to offer up some much needed TLC.
“What do you need?” was a question I heard often over the weekend, primarily when someone moved to refill an empty coffee cup or wine glass. It was so nice to just be ourselves with no schedule or deadlines. And as we lingered over that last breakfast I asked my friends if they’d gotten what they needed from the weekend.
Too late to really do anything about it had the answer been different, I was thrilled and relieved to hear that, like me, what they’d needed most was our time together. A break from the routine to simply decompress, to renew, to laugh over something goofy, or to share the insights and moments that moved us since we’d last been in the same room.
Of course as women driven to write we’re all busy with family, careers, and stories, but it seems we’re growing wiser and we know ourselves better. We trust ourselves enough that we’re not afraid to ask for what we need. Because the answers don’t come from a place of selfishness, but from a place that is increasingly self-aware.
There’s power and comfort in that, and I’m so grateful for the many special people in my life who help me answer that essential question from one day to the next.
Live the adventure!
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